Men's Health

I am a cosmo girl. I love that magazine and actually any girly magazine. And you always read about men who happened to pick up one of these magazines and fall in love with it. I happened to pick up “Men’s Health” a self proclaimed mans magazine while waiting at the dentists. And it was quite the read, some of the stuff cracked me up and I just had to share it with you.

Page 1
A man does not have to perform several times on one night to prove his virility. It’s the quality not the quantity!
Uplifting men’s spirits everywhere. Pun intended.

And the question every man is dying to ask but too afraid to ask!
How do you keep your skin glowing?
How do you side step the hangover look?
What is the deciding factor in changing your look?

If a woman flirts with me via email does she want me to ask her out?
If ones single, your age and you’ve met before and had a good time together, then yes! Trading emails is different from telephone conversations, sexual innuendoes and coy remarks just don’t slip out, they are crafted carefully. (true!) A lot of women send friends barely flirtatious email drafts to ask if this sounds to desperate.(so true!) So if you get the impression that she’s flirting, she probably is and you should ask her out. (damn right!)
If a man starts to flirt too much via email, they get paranoid that they are dealing with a cyber pervert.

What mans magazine would be complete without convincing every beer guzzling male that beer is actually good for you. From a beer lover herself, I like this article!
Beer has a lower risk of causing heart attacks and gallstones
Beer is better than
Orange juice 45 calories / 100gms
Beer 39 calories / 100gms
Soy milk 55mg / 100gms – sodium
Beer 4mg / 100gms

Well if your going to be going to a stripper – you need to know strip etiquette!
*Use the term dancer not stripper (true!)
*Never tip with coins – that is just cheap (and uncomfortable!)
*Just because she is a stripper does not mean she is a whore (agreed)
*Avoid boxers and wear tight briefs. The only tent she wants to see is at a camp site! (hahahaha)

A small penis is not a sign of inadequacy. Most penises large, medium or small are the same size when erect.
…so why classify them into small, medium or large?

And last but not least
Thank you for your feature on Gyneasmastia (June 09) I’ve lived in shame for several years but now I know I am not a woman just an oddly shaped man.
(uuurrrmmm yeah.. ok then!)

So the man’s magazine is interesting to say the least, but this girl prefers her cosmo any day.

The fabulous life!

Presenting the fabulous life!

After a good nights sleep, wake up post 11am, because honestly which self respecting who’s who wakes up early now days. Its so passé

After a leisurely breakfast, or is it brunch? Who really cares!
Now we all know, if one eats, one must exercise. Got to look good!
No boring gymming (as the lovely Delhi’ites say!) The new and IN thing to do is Pilates.
With the right type of breathing and some well designed work out plans – Pilates is the answer to getting the new you.
It’s off to the spa then. Got to protect your body against this horrible humid weather we’ve been having. Protect those digits ladies! Don’t want chipped nail polish now do we. Gasp!

A head massage, shoulder / back rub, the nitty gritties of hair removal and pedi / mani – one is ready to go.

Oh look at the time! Luncheon with the girls awaits. A quaint Italian joint is the choice for today.
Hello darlings
And wow you look fantastic today
How was the honeymoon wink wink
Floats around the place.

After finally getting down to ordering, a couple of rounds of cocktails later, and some well deserved lunch. Its time to say tata and flounce off for a bit of shopping. Louis Vitton is having a sale. Everyone is checking it out.

Now with all the absolutely gorgeous hunks gracing the silver screen, a movie is always on the schedule. If its bad boy Bradley Cooper in Hangover or Yummy Ryan Renolds in The Proposal. Its movie time darling!

Post movie – coffee is always a good idea. But needs to be on the go, us busy girls have to get home and get ready for the night ahead.
But a quick stop at the pool before heading back home. All those calories! One needs to be careful dear.
A 10 minute shut eye in the steam, walk out looking good and feeling refreshed.

A quandary!! What to wear??
Tap freshly done nails against wardrobe.
Finally pick out that perfect piece!
Dressed and ready – its time to hit the town.

Advice – don’t always stay in one place – its all about being seen everywhere! Party till the break of dawn, difficult in Delhi where everything ‘seems’ to close at 1, but its all about breaking the rules isn’t it?

Head back home to a well deserved sleep. Advice – don’t drive drunk. You’re too pretty to die!

Wash off that make up and slip into those covers and cuddle the one next to you.
Until tomorrow..
Xoxo
Shreez!

The life of the ‘fabulous’ and since I have been in Delhi for the part 2 months, without a care in the world – my life is imitates this life kind of poorly.

Wake up post 11 – well that ones true, I am a facebook addict and end up chatting with half the world till 3am!
What to do!

Breakfast / lunch depends on what time post 11 I actually surface. *sheepish shrug*

Pilates – YES I have started that. YES its great fun. YES my body is in excruciating pain. But it’s a blast and I have blondie with me, so that’s good motivation.

Spa treatment is done every two weeks. Oh how I missed these head massages. Though my hair seriously needs a trim. Oh how I miss you hoops!!!!

Luncheon with the girls – happened once. I wanted to shoot my self. To discuss the pros and cons of a summer versus winter wedding is not really how I want to spend my afternoon. And to sum up the debate eloquently
“Who really wants to sweat at a wedding darling? Gasp!”
Shreez rolls her eyes!

Shopping – ZILCH / NADA / NOPE / NAY
I know does not sound like me, but hey even this girl needs to keep her purse strings tied.

Movies – ok that’s my guilty pleasure. I love watching movies! Hangover - hilarious. Can I get Bradley Cooper sent to India?

Coffee is usually done with Blondie – or I stroll down to the local barista with a good book and feel happy.

Swimming another one of my favourite things to do. Up to 70 laps a day baby!

I have gone out a total of 2 times since I have been in Delhi. And honestly give me CNSVC, monitor gin, fried eggs, henna, permanent marker, laughter, memories, jokes and great conversation anyday!

And to last bit of the fabulous life – cuddling next to that someone special, I spend every other night getting attacked by my dog, trying to get onto my bed. But then again I have been away for 4 years, so now he thinks the bed is his.
Oh life!

And that my friends, is the fabulous life of shreez.
xoxo

VOTE!

A blatant form of advertising for a good friend.

Papa Romero and his lovely wife need some help. They are applying for a reality show in India. And the couple with the maximum votes gets a chance to go on the show. All it takes is to go to the following website
http://www.greatdrivingchallenge.com/application/Vani/

Put in a valid email id, click vote and then click the verification email. It will take 5 minutes top. They would appreciate all the help they can get.
Pass on the message. Deadline is quickly coming up.
Chocolate is promised to all those who vote.
Thanks a ton!!!
♥ Me

Passing thoughts.

I just watched a show on national geographic - hostage abroad. They focused on the 1994 kidnapping of 3 british tourists along with 1 american tourist - in return for the release of 10 Kashmiri militants.

I was 10 when this happened, but hearing about it today, evoked a strong emotional reaction. To imagine the terror what these tourists when too. I have friends around the world, friends like these tourists who see India as a top choice for the backpacking traveller.

That mystical place called India.

These tourists were kept prisioners for 32 days. Befriended by an 'indian' but actually Omar Saeed Sheikh, they were invited to visit a typical indian village but instead were kept hostage for a month.

The ol indian hospitality, turned on its head.



Watching this show, I sat back and saw a bit of my friends in those 4 travellers. Wanting to experience something. Trusting people. It scared me. What if that was W, M, A, V, K or someone else.



I went on to do some more research on this, and found out that the hijakking in 1999 of the indian airlines flight was so that the militants could free Omar Saeed Sheikh in turn for the 180 passangers. He then went on to behead Daniel Pearl (American journalist, beheaded in Pakistan - 2002) He is currently in jail awaiting a death sentence. Will it happen. I highly doubt it.



Why am I writing about this? I honestly dont know. On one hand its a warning to the travellers coming to experience 'india' . With the amount of radical fanatics out there, the possibility of this happening again it high.



I watched the final video of Daniel Pearl. What causes one human being to torture and kill another. To have the blood of another man on oneself. I have never seen a gun in real life. Violence like this does not touch my life. Though there is no guarantee that it will remain that way. Every day we live with the hope that nothing will happen.

That the malls we walk in, wont be blown away
That the airports we go through, wont be blown away
That the flights we take wont be flown into buildings
That the person who walks into a busy building wont take out a gun and shot anything in sight.


Do we really have any guarantees in this world?

Just popping in to say hello

Yeah I know, I last did a post 2 months ago. Shame on me.
So whats going on in the life of Shreez. A lot and very little at the same time. My time in Kodai has finally come to an end. Its weird knowing that I wont be there for opening assembly or getting ready for the staff welcome back dinner. But like all good things, this too needed to come to an end.
The last month and half was crazy.
New friendships were formed.
Old ones further developed.
And now I look back the bond which has formed, in every part of the world, someone awaits.. my friends.
I am back in Delhi now. Its weird, after being constantly around people to now becoming pretty much a recluse. Not that I mind it. But it sucks being unable to talk to CNSVC anytime I want. So its online chats at different times of the day (and night) to cover all the time differences.
Life in Delhi is pretty chilled out. Stay up late, wake up even later. Read. Eat. Chat. The usual schedule of the unemployed.
Well I have a month to enjoy it. And then my next adventure begins.
I am off to Bangalore in August, to start the student life again. I am getting my teaching degree from Christ College. So now am in the midst of finding a place to stay.
If anyone has any ideas - please email me :) and too all my friends in Bangalore I hope to see you soon.
Been hanging out a lot with Blondie. Best friends, you gotta love them! Movies, Pedicures, Nights out... the city life is good :)
Nothing more to say really. Just thought I'd pop in and say hello.

Listening to ~ Stu's song (from the movie the hangover)
Loving ~ skype and its video option. So kicked to talk to Wiggles, Kiwi and Mendhi Girl

xoxo
S

So am I asking for it?

Hoops once said “Shreez, you are so aggressive when you are in Delhi. What happens to the calm Shreez we know?”
My response: you got to be aggressive in Delhi. Because where ever you go, what ever you do, there are men watching, leering and mentally undressing you.

I came across a blog today – blank noise (http://blog.blanknoise.org ) Blank Noise is comprised of volunteers in many different cities and meetings and interventions are facilitated by city coordinators against eve teasing.

As I read through the various posts by women on eve teasing, a million thoughts run through my head. And just reading about what others have been through, my heart beats faster, my chest contracts and just breathing is labored. Because every word I read, reflects to a certain extent what I have been through, what every woman in India has been through.

Staring at you
Accidentally brushing up against you
Rubbing you
Pinching you
Sticking close to you in a crowded bus
Lewd comments
Outward sexual aggression

Every one of these things has happened to me; it happened to my friends, it’s still happening to women out there. What’s the answer you get – “She must have asked for it”

Honestly is that what you’re always going to say
It’s always the girls fault
She dressed provocatively
She was acting loose
He was enticed

Tell me how do I ask for it when I was walking about home in the middle of the afternoon in my school uniform and a man on bike drives past and pinches my breasts.
Is that asking for it?

and they say women cant keep their mouths shut

Enter - Wiggles and Dreads.
Well it is my fault for telling them about my love life.
The tale is now regaled at gatherings and facebook.
Lovely :)
.
.
.
.
But you gotta love them!
I love my friends...

Of course New Zealand has electricity, I saw it on the world map… at night!

So the past two weeks have been fun! Hanging out with friends and enjoying the last few days we have together. It always happens .. get to know people really well at the end of semester and wishing we were this close at the beginning of semester.

We have been planning to make pizza since Friday. We were going to do it at Benderloch. So we arrive there at 6 ready to make some pizza. In walks SuperMario – our chef and goes so where are the ingredients?
Me: Uuumm dint you guys go buy them this afternoon?
SM: Yeah they are at Mehendi’s house.
Me: Dang!
SM: Ok, so we will just walk down and get it.
Me: What about the vegetables?
SM: Oh wiggles is getting it
Cue entrance – wiggles
SM: where are the veggies
W: what veggies?
Oh shit!
So there goes the plan of making pizza. We stick to tibbs instead.

Sunday after Frisbee, we decided to have another go at making pizza and head out to Kiwi’s place. (which btw is a gorgeous house!)
Plan was to be there at 6, start cooking and eat dinner by half past 7.
In walks in SM at 7!
Okay so we are a bit off on time, but hey no issues…lets get this pizza going.

So we chop and we dice and we grate, and its all ready to go.
Unfortunately the oven does not work!
Slight problem right… anyhoo… we will just ask the dorm if we can use their oven.
No such luck – they don’t have an oven!
Strike one

We’ll just call on the neighbours says Kiwi.
They are not at home
Strike two

Frustration rises!
Lets call Margaret and being the lovely lady that she is, calls us down to bake the pizza.
Remember that we are walking through a campus, which is known for bison roaming around, oh and let us not forget Bison Bob (he was attacked by bison!)
Make it to M’s safe, the oven is on… lets get this show on the road!

Step 1: open oven door
Step 2: put tray in
Step 3: scream in frustration because the tray does not fit

Can you say strike 3!

After laughing out of sheer exhaustion. We become creative. Lets just say hunger pangs make you think way out of the box.
So tray one is put in at an angle – yes! At least one pizza will cook.
Now what about tray 2? Too big to put in.

Just fold it in half and make a calzone !
Not as easy as it sounds.
After some clever manoeuvring, its pushed into the oven and now we just wait.

Well to cut a long story short, 20 min later, we have one pizza and one…I really don’t know what to call it.
Let the picture speak for it self.

Walk back up… hoping no bison were around.

Made it back safe, ended up sitting on the kitchen floor eating the ‘pizza’
Playing with left over dough
Just another Sunday at Kodai
“No honestly, looking at it – I don’t feel hungry” – Margaret

1 May 2009

Its May 1 2009!
I have 20 days till the semester comes to an end
23 days till closing staff meeting
23 days and my time in Kodai comes to an end
I am an emotional wreck! Everything connected to leaving, leaves me in tears. I went to the travel office today to discuss my shipment allowance etc, even talking about something as mundane – left me crying
I had the dorm parent along with some girls come and look at my apartment, since it’s going to be part of the dorm next semester. It broke my heart. I honestly don’t know how I am going to do this.
To go down the mountain and know that I wont be coming back up in a month.

Erh Eh and all that!

It’s been too long! And with so much happening, I am going to have to resort to photographs and bulleted points to cover the last few weeks or so…
*THE EUCY IS DONE. Its at the printers as I type J gets back in 3 weeks and the fruits of my labour shall be seen
*Impromptu get together’s at my house. Wine, tequila and gin involved
*Just chatting about random things till one in the morning
*Hiding eggs, bread and sprite in a bullet
*Watching movies with really bad acting
*That’s what she said!
*The all school play is DONE. Was in charge of make up. Good fun! Always a blast hanging out back stage. Just let’s say some of the videos are hilarious!!!
*Waking up at 5am to go for sunrise service on Easter morning, then deciding it was going to rain, so instead dropped other people off. Leaving the house in my pajamas and hair a complete mess, and going for a drive around the lake with hoops and then stopping off At a dhaba and getting chai. I love moments like that
*Watching a movie with male frontal nudity for the first time. Yeah forgetting sarah marshal isn’t that great!
*Making a rock garden
*Having a rock dropped on my finger
*Realizing that every finger on my hand is injured in some way or the other.
*Realizing that I have really weird fingers
*KFCc
*FML

*WC
*Am back to crocheting. Yay me! Did 4 hats in 4 days.
*Am now god mother again. Looks like I am headed to Hyderabad for the christening next week
*Laughing hysterically in the staff lounge
*Going crazy on coffee highs (note to self, no more days of 8 cups of coffee and no food!)
*“Can you say Cat Face”
*“Wiggles have you arisen?”
*CSC
*Crazy nights at the golf course
*Ali baba pants
*Coffee at quicky’s

*Long weekend in Bangalore. The most relaxing holiday ever. Thank you Rays for making it an amazing weekend!!
*Nervous about the future
*Emotional about the past
*Trying to take in every thing of the present

"Spicy Goat"

"Thats all!"