Battered bruised and burnt

Quite the title for a blog post what say you?
But the contents of this post are completely true and explain why I am called Calamity Jane / Accident Prone etc etc

Lets break it down (maybe I should be careful with my words. All I need is to break down now!)

Battered:
So I am doing my usual Sunday activity – Ultimate Frisbee. It’s going pretty well. I have caught a few, done a few decent throws and I even think my team is up. So why battered? Well Shreez decided to run across the end zone to try and catch a Frisbee which just seems to be floating in the air waiting for some one to grab it. I tell you it was screaming into the wind “catch me Shreez, catch me and get a point for your team, catch me and be the star!” Well self obsessed me starts to run. Faster and faster I go, the Frisbee (lets name him mike) while mike just stays mid air. Me being the bright spark that I am thought if I slide I will be able to catch mike before he touches the ground, which he is now precariously close to. Mistake number one – the ground is not wet which makes sliding difficult – the whole friction concept. Shreez trips – slam on her knees – bam on to her shoulder and stop the whole thing with the side of her head!
Wham bam kapooie.
I see stars mummy, they are bright and sparkly
Well the usual Frisbee crowd are not fazed. They stay where they are waiting for me to get up and throw mike back up.
A couple of wobbles and I am ready to go again. Battered but ready to go!

Bruised:
So back tracking to Thursday, I had my go at indoor soccer. Now yeah I know what you are thinking, are you serious, shreez with your clumsiness you want to run around with a ball between your feet. Jeez talk about being an idiot. Well I realized that my skills do not lie in that area but I did do quite a good job being goalie. 45 minutes passed with no one being able to score against me. Well don’t pat my back just as yet, I was playing against dreads, hoops, dan and wiggles. But they were kicking pretty hard and I had solid bruises over my knees, arms and legs. So thus my story of being bruised.

Burnt:
And the crème da la crème, my story of being burnt. So apart from being self obsessed I am quite vain as well and obviously I cant walk out of the house with my hair looking like a mess. So early Monday morning I decided to straighten my hair with my normal iron since I dint have my straightening iron with me and in the midst of it I nicked my forehead with the side of the iron leading to a Harry Potter scar. Talk about being clumsy!

So with my new look – black hair, scar across my forehead and bloodshot eyes I look well I don’t look like me and don’t feel like me either.